Welcome to The Hole in the Roof - in other words, the little space in which we can sit and observe changes to the site as they happen - meaning both this website, and the hospital itself. Here you can check the latest gossip, or see what's been added to the site, with the most recent updates at the top. I'd recommend that all regular visitors head straight to this page whenever you pop by - that way you can find out if there's anything you might not have seen yet. Any links from this page will take you straight to the updated item in question.


LATEST UPDATE: Thursday 13th May 2004

This isn’t a proper update – it’s just for testing purposes, but still …

Welcome, at long last, to (or dare I say – go on, try it if you like).

Yes folks, The Shrine has been resurrected from its near-death experience and shall continue to grace cyberspace from its new bigger and better home, courtesy of Maidenhead’s very own ClockTowerWeb.

Serious grooviness coming this way soon – so watch out. Oooh …

P.S. Just a reminder that Ray Hurley-Castle’s Conquest 2002 archive is very much offline for the moment. This is entirely down to the site where it was being hosted choosing to remove it all. Fear not, however, because we’ll be relocating it soon – but just don’t tell us that the links don’t work in the meantime, because we already know that. And that goes for many other non-working links too.


LATEST UPDATE: Sunday 21st September 2003

  • Just a very brief note to say that we've just added the article from Friday's Maidenhead Advertiser - which you can find cached HERE on our Newspaper Coverage page. It regards a meeting set for Thursday 9th October (though it fails to name the location) at which you are encouraged to put forward any views and discuss (or should that be laugh at?) the latest development proposal. We at The Shrine wholeheartedly encourage anybody from the vicinity with a concern for the site to turn up and speak your mind. Go on, don't be afraid. It should be very interesting to see what comes of this event anyhow - and we'll naturally pass on any developments that result as we hear them.
  • And a quick thank you from myself to everybody for all your words of encouragement over the past few days - it's much appreciated. I'll get there. Fear not.

UPDATE: Wednesday 17th September 2003


  • This update is brought to you by The Webmaster's Liver ... or what's left of it.
  • Webmaster Damon Says: Many of you appear to have noticed that The Shrine hasn't been added to for quite some time. Indeed, the Message Board has the odd faked message purporting to be from myself and promising impending additions (hint: don't assume that you can avoid revealing your true identity by posting under a false name because everything is there in black and white, as the police know all too well). Still, at least this seems to show some sense of enthusiasm toward the website out there - which is fantastic to know - because we love you too.

    That said, I feel compelled to comment that not one person has cared enough to point out (well, until Paul did last week - merci, Mr. B) that virtually none of the links on the last update actually worked at all anyway. This "care factor zero" attitude does leave me rather baffled as to why any of you would be getting anxious for another one. But still, we've got to keep the show on the road. And keep the show on the road we will. But first ...

    I think I'd describe myself as naturally resilient to the bad things that life throws at us. I've never been the sort of person who gets ill. In 29 years, you could count the days I've been absent from work or school through illness on one hand. 2003, however, is proving a hard nut to crack. Let's put it another way - it isn't exactly going to go down as the greatest year of my life.

    Abdominal pains that progressively worsened since about February culminated in a diagnosis of severe internal damage at the end of July. The bottom line is that my liver is in a very bad way. This is in part due to having just a little too much fun for a decade (for which I hold nobody accountable for except myself), along with other factors that have yet to be determined. At any rate, it's going to take a lot of time and effort to get it working properly again. Right now, I've almost forgotten what it feels like to be completely at peace with yourself. It hurts when I'm standing up, and it hurts when I'm laying down. Without prescribed painkillers, I wouldn't even be able to sleep at night.

    In addition, the special diet they put me on ended up accidentally starving me to the point where I began hallucinating (and I mean evil ones). I don't think it was conceived as a weight-loss plan but that's about the only remotely positive thing that came out of it - although I'd never recommend it to the readers of Woman's Day. Seriously, your rabbit would have laughed at what they've been forcing me to eat. And this probably had something to do with bringing on a spate of panic attacks, the latest of which - on Friday - lasted over an hour and put me in intensive care for the night. These episodes are utterly terrifying - as you'd know all too well if you've ever had the misfortune to experience one (far more so than an encounter with The Flincher, I assure you).

    Never slept so little
    Never smoked so much
    Lost my concentration I could
    even lose my touch
    Talking to myself
    Crying out loud
    Only I can hear me
    I'm stuck inside a cloud.

    (George Harrison, 2001)

    In short, I'm not exactly a well webmaster just now. As a result, maintenance of The Shrine hasn't been anywhere near the top of my priorities of late. Don't get me wrong, I love this website and all that it entails - but I've been more concerned with the notion of staying alive (just like Maurice Gibb didn't) and more than content to focus solely on getting out of my predicament on a day to day basis. I can assure you that I'll get there (hey - you don't get rid of me that easily) - but I will ask that you try your best to bear with me a little, that's all.

    What it all means is that The Shrine will get updated when it gets updated. Perhaps it's the payback I get for starting a hospital website - but as long as I'm a patient in one hospital, you'll have to be patient regarding this hospital. No amount of "you fat lazy sod" on the Message Board is going to make it happen any quicker. It's also worth bearing in mind that, although there's been plenty of CRCMH-related talk and happenings of late - particularly with the increased police concern and continuing redevelopment matters - we've received precious little new material that would make a useful visual addition to the website. That's not to say that we don't have a large backlog of our own doing (because we certainly do - photos, film, memorabilia and more- and we will get there with it eventually), just that worthy contributions from elsewhere have been increasingly thin on the ground. It's due to this, however, that the Message Board has truly proved its worth.

    Those of you who have become part of the growing online CRCMH community have done a good job in keeping us all up to date with hospital-related issues. Sure, there's been the occasional rubbish on the forum - which is only to be expected (see any other online forum or e-group in the world for supporting evidence) - but there's also been some useful insights and engaging topics popping up every now and then. So don't be afraid to post - the more people contribute, the more everybody will get out of it. And once again - do make the most of local Sgt. Graham Johnston's continuing presence on the Message Board. By regularly dropping by, he's providing you with a wonderfully informal way to communicate your CRCMH-related questions and concerns to the
    Thames Valley police. By working together, you have the opportunity to make the community you live in as good as the cyberspace one you frequent, So don't be afraid - go ahead and ask away - he doesn't bite!

    And on a further Shrine development, ClockTowerWeb's Paul Baker (the mastermind behind no less) has offered to host this website in order to keep it local (it's a local website for local people - says me in the darkest depths of
    Upside-Down Land). This is a rather timely offer and very handy for a number of reasons that we don't need to delve into here - so we'll keep you posted with future developments on the matter as they unfold. Though again, please be patient because nothing is going to happen quite as quickly as I'd like at the moment for reasons already explored. "Well, can't Webmaster Owen do it then?" I hear you ask. Well, he's pretty snowed under too - in a housemungously sprogtastic type way. Actually, I might as well hand you over to the man himself for a quick word - then I'll be back with a couple of actual CRCMH-related things for you ("Yay - so we do get an update at last!" cries the multitudes) ...
  • Webmaster Owen Says: I've been very busy with BUY!! SELL!! BUY BUY? SELL HOUSE HOME PROPERTY BUYY SELLLL which is a bit on the shite side as far as fun goes, but still we'll be moving again soon into somewhere Good because we're running out of room at our place as Jaz (now a year and a month and a bit old) is accumulating vast quantities of fluffy toyage. Gosh, it's a whole barrel of joy.

    The Foragelet
    is doing amazingly well - she's walking everywhere, saying around 30 words consistantly and surprising us with oddities daily. We were wandering around the garden when she pointed to a bush and said BUDLIA. She was right. And when bored, she sings the 60s Batman theme. She has never seen the program.

    Buh? dinna dinna Batman!

    My hair seems to be re-dreading itself at an alarming rate.

    I'm buying Transformers
    from eBay as a hobby.

    The Shrine
    shall be scribbled upon more when the time that we need more of is with us...

    Is The Flincher a paranormal farmer?


Don't mind if I do.
I didn't know you danced..?
Just the once, she was blind drunk and I was feeling rather unwell.
Did you..?
Why of course!
She's still floating there to this day!
Good show! Glad to hear it! Encore! Vamoose!
That's fightin talk, stranger.

Grooves and healing Kaliber.

  • Okay. We've got a couple of things for you today, so let's begin with some news which we'd like to apologise for not having brought to you sooner. Lamentably, it's of the sad variety and it heralds the end of an important CRCMH-related era.

Prof. Eric Bywaters

Professor Eric George Lapthorne Bywaters, C.B.E, pioneering rheumatologist and CRCMH unit director (1947-1975), passed away on Wednesday 2nd April 2003 at the age of 93.

Along with his sucessor, Barbara Ansell (who died in 2002), Bywaters was the most important and respected contributor to the medical advances made during the life of the CRCMH. In many ways, it was Bywaters that made the hospital what it was, and he will be fondly remembered and sadly missed by all who knew or encountered him.

A full obituary appears on the British Medical Journal website, which we have permanently cached for you here along with his self-portrait sketch on the Prof. Bywaters page.

Three cheers for The Prof from us here at The Shrine.

  • It recently came to my attention that the What's for Dinner? page was looking slightly wrong. Within the past year, it had been updated to feature a great deal more names from the menu board. However, although the page was most certainly re-made and sitting on my computer, it seems that the new version strangely wasn't ever uploaded to the website at all - even though, I suspect, it would have been mentioned on an update at some point. Therefore, we now bring you the extended page in its full glory. And, er... "unch". Whatever that's supposed to mean.
  • We've got a couple of additions to the Your Tales page, in the form of Addictive and Spirits - both of which are nice little exploration tales, the former revealing some of the most interesting information thus far regarding the mortuary. These accounts also serve to remind us that many of the greatest CRCMH expeditions and write-ups - as evident from the growing collection of tales - have been from the girls. It's nice to know that hospital addiction isn't exclusively a male issue. We've also added some comments from a fellow architecture afficionado in Tennessee - under the heading Best - just to remind us that the appeal of The Shrine has spread slightly further than the Thames Valley (and indeed Melbourne). Whilst we're on the subject of the Your Tales page though, you may have noticed that there's been a severe lack of stories added to it over the past year - a trend which we expect will continue. There are two main reasons for this.

    One: Many such accounts are nowadays conveyed directly to the Message Board, thus eliminating the need for us to re-format them for the main site. Indeed, unless you have a very important or elaborate tale, you're really better off putting it straight onto the forum so that people can comment on it - plus it'll appear instantaneously.

    Two: Most tales we've received in recent times have had a supernatural angle, so they've ended up on the Paranormal Realm page instead.
  • And finally, just in case you needed any further confirmation that the local police are far from being the enemy of the CRCMH site - this link was suggested to us by our resident law authority, Sgt. Johnston...

    What's your favourite building?

    As audiences vote to save an old property for the BBC's Restoration, and architects mull the year's best new buildings - what's your favourite building? Why not have a look HERE - and nominate the lovable bane of our existence? You never know - somebody somewhere might listen to us.
  • So there you have it. Do remember the bit about being patient - but most of all, have fun, keep up the forum activity, keep the useful contributions coming - and we shall returneth with more just when you least expect us to. Be good.

Check out previous update notices and meaningless banter...



this site PWRG enterprises 2004