HOLE IN THE ROOF
for October/November 2002
Sunday 17th November 2002
THE SHRINE IS PROUDLY
BROUGHT TO YOU BY
update is proudly brought to you by Hurtle Lupton. There's
nothing to add is there - other than the fact that he's
real. Seriously. Go on, you know you want to
harrass him at firstname.lastname@example.org
(if only to ask "what were your parents
a very long-standing mystery has truly been solved this time around.
The answer to easily one of the most frequently asked questions in
fact - being "where is/was the morgue?" Thanks to newly
uncovered plans courtesy of CRCMH devotee Michael (eternal gratitude),
we can now finally reveal the precise location of this much sought
after macabre relic.
So feast your eyes on this:
interesting is that, whilst we always knew it was around the
north of the site (as indicated by all available evidence),
it is unlikely that it ever occurred to anybody to search this
far north. In fact, this area was for a long time behind a fence
and considered part of the neighbouring (and occasionally thriving
with activity) sawmill complex - strictly out of bounds to any
explorer who wished to remain unseen. Remarkably, it appears
to lie behind the building that's behind the staff building
- certainly the last place we'd have ever thought of looking.
So, what does it look like now? Well, nobody knows..."yet."
Have a look at the incriminating plan here
(which is now resident in our Maps section), and then
head off without further ado to Michael's
website where he's put up some nice large photos of the
plans up just for you to browse (and be warned if you have a
slower connection - because by "large" we mean a full
megabyte or so each).
Better quality scans are potentially headed this way soon, and
indeed a discussion on some other things revealed by these latest
finds (for instance, the exact purpose of many rooms and wings
can now be reliably confirmed - so we'll endeavour to get around
to adjusting references on The Shrine accordingly).
- The maidenhead.net
graced with this message from "M.K" on November 2nd:
was exploring the hospital today in Cliveden and we heard lots of things
and then we saw a black figure zoom quickly across infront of the main
building! Then we threw a rock or stone at the lodge and it came flying
back at us!! I was shit scared!"
Yes, we nearly died laughing - but please refrain from sending us similar
literary masterpieces. Unless they're true, that is.
it must be Christmas or something. There's a few other things
currently being played about with before they're put online,
and Ray's new stuff is coming along slowly but surely too.
Oh - almost forgot - the solution unscramble code for
last update's CRCMH Craptic Crosspwürg is: 5951.
The winner of our first prize - a Mercedes SLK convertible
- was Mr Jethro.Q.Walrustitty of Effing Sodbury.
Friday 1st November 2002
THE SHRINE IS PROUDLY
BROUGHT TO YOU BY
update is proudly brought to you by the rather "stunning"
Bettina Huebers - who has long claimed to be Paul McCartney's
illegitimate daughter. Well, actually it isn't because
we've never met her. Yeah right, just like Paul never met her
mother, probably. Our real sponsor is at the bottom of
here's something quite interesting - he says whilst you're still
thinking a) Who the hell is Bettina Huebers? and b) What? Another
update? Crikey - it's only been a week! Are they on drugs or
something? It's true that the "other interesting creepy
places to explore" section (aka Other
Hauntings) has been a little stagnant since we first went
online, but at last we're pleased to announce a new location
to join Taplow Lodge
and Braywick House.
Yes folks, it's Dropmore
House. It's amazing that so obvious a place didn't appear
here sooner than it has, but now - with extra special thanks
to our roving investigator Balraj Gill - you can discover what
mysterious joys are nestling a mere few hundred metres up the
road from our very own hospital (figuratively speaking on that
last bit sadly). And intriguing it all is too - go take a look.
from that to something far more trivial - quite literally(ish).
We are even less proud to present the very first CRCMH Craptic
Crosspwürg to download. This is the first in hopefully a series
of pointless bamboozling crosswords available to you at The
Shrine. It's crap (and indeed carp) - hence "Craptic Crosspwürg",
and it's not known whether anyone can possibly analyse our brains
enough to figure the whole thing out. Some clues are "cryptic",
others "quick", but most all are Pwürg related, CRCMH related,
or a twisted combination of them both. All words are real words
- with the exception of a couple of names/places/whatever which
are well-known within Pwürg/CRCMH circles. So have fun with
it and drive yourself completely mad ...or don't.
But before you get too comfortable, it should be known that
we have decided to be, well, complete and utter bastards. The
solution to the crosspwurg has been scrambled, which means that
you can't see the answers until we give you the special 4-digit
unscramble code. We don't want to drive you mad forever, so
howsabout this: We'll post the code on this very page in a week
or two (mid-November), so see how you go in the meantime (if
you're bored enough to be bothered at all, that is).
To have a go at the puzzle off-line
1. Download Across
Lite and install on your computer (it's only 321kb
so it won't eat too much of your hard-drive - and a
nifty little piece of software it is too - it's absolutely
free and there's squillions of other crosswords available
for it elsewhere in cyberspace (and will be more here
2. Save our puzzle file (crosspwurg001.puz)
to your computer - but be warned - it's a "whopping"
3kb - told you it was funny!
3. Open the .puz file in Across Lite - and "Hey
4. Get frustrated and hate us forevermore.
Ooh - The FAQ
page (which means Frequently Asked Questions for those
of you who, rather humorously, have taken the trouble
to ask us what it stands for) has been given a slightly
new lease of life with a general updating of things
that needed updating - as well as some even more annoying
pictures of your humble webmasters.
on an equally pointless topic - fancy some funky new Pwürg desktop
wallpaper? It's 800x600 pixels, and you can get it here.
- More groovy things
Saturday 26th October 2002
THE SHRINE IS PROUDLY BROUGHT
TO YOU BY
update is proudly brought to you by Line-O-Coke from
MB Games. Well, actually it isn't because there's no such
product - and even if there was, judging by the kids' clothes
they would've ceased making it a few decades ago. Our real
sponsor is at the bottom of this page...
- Aha! We returneth
with much alarm and surprise. Well, whatever. Nothing particularly new
seems to be going on regarding the hospital site itself, but we've got
a few new things for you to peruse here...
- You can now indulge
yourselves - and this is a really good one for the CRCMH enthusiast
- in a lovely
aerial shot of the entire site seemingly taken shortly after completion
of the hospital. It's only missing the Animal Lab area off the edge,
and Taplow Lodge is on there too - woohoo! It
comes from an old postcard and appears here courtesy of the Ansell/
Bywaters book (though it needed so much doctoring that it's virtually
an original work now). Now you get to see where you've wandered around
from the air -"oooh..."
- A new addition
to the History page - a decent
reproduction of the stone tablet which once stood outside the main entrance
doors. This was also derived from an illustration in the Ansell-Bywaters
book and has solved a long-running issue. We already have one
snapshot from 1993 which features the plaque - the problem being
that it was frustratingly cropped long ago (for a Pwürg sleeve
no less - but things like that thankfully don't need to happen these
days with computer image manipulation) and the negative was lost in
the mists of time. Although the top half of the text was recorded and
is reproduced several times here already, we were never sure what the
other half said. So now we all know. Isn't that nice?...
- Sometime CRCMH
visitor Bob Hurley has kindly donated 2 trippy photos which we've chucked
in the Ghost Photos section.
They aren't technically ghost photos but they don't really fit anywhere
else either. Go check out the page for a more detailed explanation.
- Aha! At last -
we finally get to find out who Peter Wakefield Sault is, and you can
too by having a look in the Celebrities
section. You may recall that he was mentioned as being born in the CRCMH
in a history page factoid (which has been removed now that we have a
slightly better profile elsewhere). Anyway, we'd written this:
Factoid #2: Peter Wakefield Sault - author of "The Keys of Atlantis"
was born at the CRCMH at the stroke of midnight on September 30th,
1950. If anybody has actually heard of either him or his alleged book,
we'd love to know - because we're all stumped here.
So Peter responded
I ever got the name of the hospital wrong. I always thought it was
the Royal Canadian Military Hospital. So did my (ex-)wife, who was
also born there, 27th April 1951. Many thanks to whoever for tying
up my umbilical so neatly.
Peter Wakefield Sault
he is quite real, and indeed has produced some interesting (if slightly
mindboggling) work of both a literary and musical nature. So go and
have a look for yourself.
couple more former CRCMH staff members have been added to the list
on the Contact page at
their own request. Let's hope some there's serious reunions on the
horizon...just on the off-chance that we can get the leftover beer
that's just about it for the moment methinks. Except to say that everyone
of sound mind (well, actually that isn't a prerequisite) should be
checking out Webmaster Owen's expanded Fwip
site (aka the Pwürg download centre). It's full of funktabulous
art and things (puts this site to shame to be honest) - and will be
hosting more CRCMH photos and - shock horror! - even MPEG video footage
in the not-at-all-that-far-away future. So there. Hope you're all
having fun anyway - and remember that we're still both a tad more
preoccupied than "normal" (whatever that means?) at the
moment, so please do be patient if waiting for a response from us
- We're doing our best to get everything done.
Official computer of the CRCMH Shrine
"Can you guess what the "C" stands for yet?"
...No, hang on...that only made true sense with last month's
"sponsor". Although, it does kind of still compute...
(Yes, but only if you leave the room
first - Ed.)